Saturday, February 27, 2010

Sick little guy

Brayden had a fever earlier in the week. One hundred and two for about a day and a half. He was so sad. My bundle of energy was just Mr. lethargo. He would sit around with his eyes half mast and cling to his blankies. Gavin kept asking Bray questions and Bray wouldn't answer. Gavin got really frustrated to have his playmate give up any sort of activity.
We made a play date for Gavin to get out of the house (and hopefully not catch the cold). When we went to drop him off at Mrs. Stephanie's house to play with her nephew Charlie, two people whom Bray loves...he just whimpered "Athen"...his name for Gavin, as Gav jumped out of the car. Even Mrs. Stephanie, whim he adores couldn't muster much out of him.
When we got to the Doctor Brayen lost it the minute we walked into the exam room. He's had a lot of shots lately and is now terrified of anything resembling a doctor. When the nurse left he calmed down, but even when my mom came in with her stethoscope on he cried until she took it off. He cried for the Dr. and even the special Lightening McQueen I bought him and a Lollipop could not calm him down. Finally, after checking him out, my mom just carried a sniffly Bray out of the room.
Two ear infections and a really sore throat, was the prognosis. Poor kiddo. I felt sad for my hot bodied, sick little guy. I felt really bad, that there was a part of me that loved having him slow down and cuddle. Loved that I was the one he wanted and loved that I was his main source of comfort (well aside from his blankie, stuffed monkey and paci). Granted, after awhile it did get old being clung to...but in a strangley sweet way.
After 12 hours of antibiotics, bray is back in his crazy, energetic full glory. He and Gavin are playing and fighting, he's been pushing the limits and singing through the stores at the top of his lungs. It's good to see. We missed our little boy. But a part of me also misses the little cuddler who just wanted me and hie blanky.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Some good days

Just when I am getting used to taking the kids out and they are all into their sidewalk chalk, the rain comes back! Such is life.
We have enjoyed the sunshine and I think getting out has really helped us as a family. The boys play so well outside and are both finally old enough to slide by themselves, climb the toys and what not. Brayden still needs a close eye, but he is starting to get the idea that jumping off the gaps on toys isn't the brightest move.
Yesterday, we were at Mimi and Papa's house. I had told Gavin we could play with the rocks and out in the back yard (they have a little rock pathway and they love to take the tea set that Mimi has stored in the playhouse and make "rock soup"). When I told him we couldn't go out because it had started raining, he stood at the backdoor with the saddest expression just watching the rain.
"Mama, when is it not going to rain?"
Hmmm....when will he be old enough to understand Washington?
All in all, the rain did do something for me. It made me appreciate the sunshine. A simple life lesson. Bad days make good days better, hard times make good times sweeter.
Today, Brayden is sick and Gavin really wants to watch cars...so we are going to make it a good day. We got some hot "cocko", as Gavin calls it, and we are going to snuggle in and watch cars. As I told Gavin, "Just because it's raining doesn't mean we have to be sad, we can still choose joy."
Now to live it out!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Even me

The last two days I have mustered up enough umph to take the kids outside. With such nice weather in Washington and nearing the mid-fifties, one would think this would be the first thing I would do with the kids. But that "one" doesn't know me so well. I have always struggled with this activity...and I wish I didn't.
First off, I have a hard time motivating myself to do it alone. There is no one for me to talk and I just stand there and long for adult conversation. Correction: I do not stand there. I spend my time chasing the kids from here to there. Brayden has no fear of anything and is pretty much an accident waiting to happen, no matter where you take him. Being Mr. Independent does not help this scenario one iota. He runs into the street, off the gaps on the toys, into the water...you name it. If you find a place to go, he'll find a hazard.
Second, our backyard, while voted a great place to play is totally in the shade most this time of year and freezing cold. I do not like cold. This also keeps the ground wet, which in turn makes my children wet, which in turn causes a whole load of laundry to be developed in one trip outside. The front yard is on a fairly busy street and we are back to Brayden and his rebellious self running straight to danger. Also, no matter which yard you pick, I see all the weeding that needs to be done and start to feel a little overwhelmed. We aren't supposed to have to weed till April, right?
Lastly, much to my chagrin, I can be pretty lazy. The whole process of getting ready, going and then getting everyone back inside and clean again sometimes makes me tired just when I think it over. (Yes, I really am that lazy...not proud of it, though. Oh and yes, I did major in Recreation and Leisure in college...I aced the leisure part).
Well, the last two days, I put my selfish desires aside and the kids and I have been out and about in the sunshine. Yesterday we took a walk, collected rocks and then the boys played with the rocks in the front yard while I weeded. Today, Gavin rode his bike, with Brayden on the back, up and down the street for awhile, then we proceeded to do some sidewalk chalk out front on the driveway and retaining wall. Miraculously, I only had to drag Brayden out of the street 3 times.
My findings on these excursions: If I can just get us out the door, we are good to go. The initial motivation is still hard for me, but everyone is a little happier after the fresh air and Vitamin D. Even me.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Reality

Daddy has been working obscene hours and been gone gone gone. He is working his normal job, as well being Principal for summer school and interviewing potential teachers after the school day is done. When he is home, he has been taking online classes and working on some potential applications for Principal positions. In short, the man has been working his "bum" off.
This weekend he had two extra days off and we were fortunate enough to go to a Lakehouse some friends of ours own, with another couple and their kids. Four whole days with daddy! It was awesome.
I do have to say, poor dad, by the time he got to vacation was sick (this is typical for him when he lets down...i think his body takes it as a sign or something). So he was awfully congested, tired and using Halls cough drops like some sort of crack. But other than that...it was so nice to have the extra set of hands and have daddy back.
We got to play games with our friends, do some light boating, throw rocks in the Lake and Gavin and his buddy became quite proficient at air hockey. It was a great time.
Unfortunately, today was back to reality. The kids had the dentist, we had to grocery shop and daddy won't be home for stories. I would say reality bites, because it's how I feel. But if I take into account that we made it through the dentist with only a few tears and everything looking good, we made it through the grocery store and actually remembered everything on our list and had cooperation, and we made it to bedtime without mommy having a breakdown...I'd say my reality is actually pretty decent...even if I don't feel it.
And so today I would like to give a shout out to the good Lord, for blessing me with a good reality, even when I pout. I don't deserve it...but then again, we don't deserve anything He gives us. I thank Him for that too!!!

Friday, February 12, 2010

reminders

My son has not peed his pants for over a week. We resorted to "incentives" and for the most part, things were going smoothly. He had mostly stopped throwing tantrums overheading to the bathroom and well, life was easier. I pointed to the car on the mantel and reminded him
"If you stay dry for three sleeps, you can have the car. Do you need to go?" And he would. It's great.
Yesterday, he kept saying, NO. I took him at his word and am really just trying to give him the control over this one. (Cuz let's face it, I do not have control of his bladder, as much as I would like to). Finally, he hadn't gone since morning, it was nearly naptime and he had a melt down. He was screaming like a banchy in timeout and I saw him cross his legs.
"Do you have to go potty Gavin?"
From the end of the hall at an earpiercing level, "Noooooo."
Okay.
Two seconds later. "Mommy, I wet my pants."
Big suprise.
And back to day one. I hate informing him he doesn't get his car for another three days. It's hard for me to see his face droop. I also hate cleaning pee.
He tells his teachers he has to go. He tells his cubbie leaders. He tells me at the grocery store. I should be thankful he rarely has accidents out in public. But I am still just dumbfounded that it's been over a year and he still pees his pants.
It's a wonderful parenting reminder that you can't do everything right and that my job is to teach him to want to do right...not just to make him do it. At the same time, I wish the reminders smelled less and were slightly more sanitary.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Independent

Brayden likes his independence. When we get out of the van, he wants to "walk". When we eat, he wants his "thork". When we change his diaper he wants to "potty". He doesn't want my hand. He doesn't want my help. He wants to do it himself
Now, if I could get Gavin, who still wants me to put his clothes and shoes on for him, to grasp this concept, we would be throwing a party. However, at one and a half, Brayden is just causing more work with his independent spirit than necessary. I let go of his hand for 20 seconds to get a five dollar bill out of my purse and he ran out of the store today. I had to drop everything and run after him, only to find a lady holding his hand and bringing him back to me with a look. (Thank you for returning my run away...look not needed).
When I took his hand he was mad. He was mad? Where does he get off being mad? I was livid! I just wanted to buy some Valentines stickers for them to make cards. That's all. Two sheets for $3.29...had my child not departed, the transaction would have taken 1 minute. Really! It was terrifying and it happened in under half a minute!
I do not want to foster a child who is over dependent on me for everything. However, I need Brayden to grasp the concept he isn't as smart as he thinks! Unfortunately, I have yet to convince him that the 30 some years of life I have on him are worth anything.
Today as he ran through the house with his sunglasses, boots and construction hat, singing into his mic, I did have to let the smile break out on my face. His spirit is just as adventurous and joyful as it is independent and it is God given. Lord, may I remember this the next time he bolts or tells me to "dop" when I try to do something for him!

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Well worth the risk

Today I felt desperate. I was so tired. I had used every last ounce of patience and I was feeling my muscles tighten together until I think my shoulders were actually touching my ears. I was pretty sure my children were actually gremlins, snickering or baring their teeth at me whenever I asked them to do something. And I was contemplating running away for the weekend, until I remembered it too, was incredibly booked and busy.
It was bath time at the end of a looooong day and all I could think was, "I haven't bathed in two days." Now sometimes I won't wash my hair for a few days, but I literally hadn't had a shower since Tuesday. Yuck. My hair was greasy greasy, stringy and I felt just plain gross. I could have been cast as a survivor after week two.
And so, after I got on the kiddos pajamas, I decided to shower. Normally I have the kids in their room time for this...aka, quarantined, but I knew that would entail screaming that I could not handle at that precise moment. And so in desperation, I put my three year old in charge. I locked the door, told Gavin he was to answer it under no circumstances, asked him to watch Brayden (yes, I told my 3 year old to watch my 1 year old) and got in the hot water.
I heard Brayden rooting around in the bathroom cupboards and ignored it. I heard him close the door and all I could think was, "Well, if they ransack the house, at least I won't know until I get out."
I will admit it wasn't as bad as I had thought. Gavin was working on a puzzle and Brayden had multiple other puzzles out, trying to open them and spread them all over the place. Gavin informed me, "He's helping." Helping who do what, I am not sure, but there was no yelling and a mess that we could easily clean.
Big sigh.
My shoulders had lowered to my mid neck and I think a few ounces of patience had seeped in through the water. My hair was clean, I had shaved the longer than I am proud of, hair off my legs and I actually smelled good. The gremlins were gone and I thought my children were cute again. We finished out the night okay. No mommy melt downs.
I must admit. I did not think giving my two kids rein of the house for even 15 minutes was a good idea. And it probably wasn't. But this case goes to show you...sometimes it is worth the risk.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

My super cute neice and nephew

So, I haven't had a chance to post about my baby neice and nephew since they were born. Here is Ashton Kiera Burkhalter. About 8 months old and reallllly cute!

This is baby Evan Thomas Ryan at Christmas. So cute and snuggly! It's been fun to cuddle the babies!