Favorite discussion as of late

Gavin: Mom I want to be a front loading garbage truck when I get bigger and bigger.

Me: Well, you can't be a garbage truck, but maybe you can be a garbage man.

Gav: But whhhhhy? You said I can be anything I want.

Me: I decided I was wrong.

Upcoming arrival

I will admit I am starting to get a tad nervous about the arrival of this baby. Not so much the actual addition to the family as the event itself. With daddy working a 45 minute commute in the opposite direction of the hospital and my last child coming 2.5 hours from when the first contraction hit (well, technically from when my water broke) I am starting to play out various scenarios in my head of how to make SURE I get to the hospital. Brayden's wasn't the easiest delivery and let's just say, things would not have gone well for him or for me if we were not at a medical center.
I know in my head God has it all under control, however my type A, overly organized self keeps giving Him some great ideas of how it could work out. You would think after listening to Gavin all day long, telling me how he thinks the day should go and whining "Whhhhhy?" when I say I have different plans, I would let up on God. But it still doesn't stop me. I am sure I am far more obnoxious than my four year old, continually pestering him with my plans, thoughts, and frustrations at not getting my way. I mean really...I, at least, should know better. Gav is just learning.
In the end, I will be interested to hear this little one's story. Both the boys had quite the different entries and stories on their way in...I am looking forward to knowing the end of this one's journey into the world.
Tomorrow is an ultra sound and I am also looking forward to making sure she is still a "she". I still have a hard time believing this, but they better have gotten it right or I maybe posting a desperate need for boy things, seeing as all mine have been given away or consigned, not to mention he'll be sleeping on flowered sheets!
I am also looking forward to seeing how big they think she is. Well, at least I think I am. We'll see after the results! It should be interesting...the hardest part will be walking out and not beginning a monologue with God to tell him my new plan after I receive all the new information. I am already praying for a peaceful spirit and a willingness to hand over the information and let Him have his way. I just hope He gives me more grace than I give Gavin...hmmm...so many lessons to learn here. More grace to Gavin and more time with my mouth shut...tough ones!

Backpacks

Gavin and Brayden have found their "backpacks". Gav's is a little blue one his Mimi and Papa have brought back from Italy and Bray's is a little frog one that Gavin got two Christmas' ago. They have been sporting them around the house, climbing on the couch, aka the "bus", and riding to school. Suddenly, school is the game of the day.
Gavin takes it quite seriously. "No Bray, you wear the back pack like this," as he puts it on both arms. "Otherwise, it's a purse." He tells Brayden how the bus works at that the backpack holds your stuff for school. Then he tells Bray what he thinks school is like. It is fun to listen to his rendition of how a school day goes.
Brayden, slings his little arms through and drives his pretend bus around. Sometimes he sticks his hand in the pack and makes the frog hop around saying ribbit ribbit. Sometimes he unzips it totally and puts it on his head. Either way, he is seriously adorable and a total crack up.
There is a small, but good example of the difference in my boys. Shawn and I were talking just last night about how different they are and how much we love their personalities...so opposite in so many ways. I remember my mom saying to me, "I don't love you or your sister better, I just love you different." I thought it was a cop out and she was trying to smoothly get out of my tactless question. But I think I finally get it.
I can say, as I watch both acting ready for school, in their different ways, I get sad already. I know come fall when Gavy really sports that backpack for the first day of preschool I will get emotional (the pregnancy hormones do not help). He really is so ready. As for Bray, I am glad he's still just 2, because as he walks around telling me he's "going school, mom" my heart and whole being says, no way Jose! I'm not ready to let that little guy go yet. Fortunately the rules tell me I can't! I have a whole year to prepare my heart to let him go too. I think it might take that long!

The to-dos and of late

I am finally feeling like we are catching up with life around here. We are also preparing to get ready for baby. I laugh when I look at my to-do list, it looks like an excerpt from some Good-Housekeeping article. However, I have crossed much off in the last two weeks and though they may seem silly, feel pretty good about the recent accomplishments.

• Reorganized all the kids clothes (including consigning a ton and packing up hand me downs), made room and put away baby's clothes too!
• Finished off the "ode to girl" in the crib corner of the room.
• Caught up on Gavin's scrapbook and only have about 4 pages left to catch up on Bray's.
• Got as far as possible in the baby book we bought for little girl.
• Made 2 sets of six freezer meals for the frozen food exchange I am a part of.
• Made Gavin's birthday invites (for his very small party) and bought his birthday present.
• Washed and sterilized all bottles and breast pump paraphernalia.
• Sorted through and found house hiding spots for all the baby "stuff"...burp clothes, crib sheets, blankets, changing pads, diapers, etc.
• Made room in the kitchen for bottles, paci's and other baby things that inevitably need room in a cupboard.
• Made a drawer of baby toys in the living room.
• Cleaned the rest of the office closet and reorganized the boys toys...eliminating some.
• Updated all our bills to online payment and created an excel budget sheet.
• Packed my bag and the baby's bag for the hospital.
• Made over5 phone calls to update various aspects of life...from new insurance to making an appointment to get the van's automatic door fixed (let's just say, being 8 months pregnant and climbing into a van to help buckle the kids has stunk).
• Did major grocery shopping trip for the month.
  

I will admit to having a day without children (thank you Grandma Joan) that helped make this all possible and an hour and a half one morning without kids (thank you Holly Moe) to make phone calls. It is amazing what can be accomplished without kids...it is also amazing how much I miss them and love hearing about all they did in our time apart.
Overall, it feels nice to be relatively caught up. Sometimes I do feel like the minute I cross something off my list, I am also writing something onto it. It reminds me of my days at work, where I would intentionally write down things I'd already done, just so I could cross more things off! But in the end, I believe we are at the point where the baby could come, the kids would have food and I would be in a pretty good state.
I am starting to get really tired by the end of the day and I am looking forward to having a little more agility and desire to be out running with the boys. I think they are ready for baby to come too. Gavin is constantly asking about his sister and Brayden is always wondering when we are going to the baby dr..
I am trying to enjoy my last few weeks with just the boys. I am noticing Brayden is getting so big and using sentences and I am a tad sad that he won't be my baby. He is too funny and turning into the family ham. I can tell he is ready to not be the baby anymore. Gavin is definitely turning into a huge nurturer and will be a great biggest brother. But I still want to capture a bit of this time with just my boys to save in my heart. It is so sweet.