Friday, August 17, 2012

Time with legos

Today I spent over an hour or two searching for the zillion pieces that belong in Gavin's lego "Harbour".  Yes, a zillion.  I couldn't believe the time I spent doing this...and all the things I could have done with that time.  Oh and to top it off, I didn't even find all the pieces yet.  I estimate at least an hour to go. 
I have an wonderful little technique I have developed with the legos.  We lay a huge white sheet on the ground and dump the ginormous tub of legos we have on the sheet, then the kids can spread them out and when we are done...grab four corners and dump back into tub. 
Today, that was the only thing that was wonderful about the legos.  Today, I tried to help Gav find the pieces for building this harbour.  Today I stepped on, sorted through, kneeled on, examined, counted, recounted, and picked at more legos than I ever want to pick at again.  It was literally back back and neck are so sore from bending over these miniscule little pieces that are required to create this harbour that my son apparently needs to have exactly like the instruction book says. 
"Could we replace a white three one with a gray three one?" 
"No mom, it is gray...not white.  The white can't go there."
"How about a dark gray one?"
For the love of pete!  The worst part is, he is quite unable to focus when helping look.  He turns over two pieces then sits back and lets me do the digging.  Oh, every now and then he'll utter a word of encouragement when I find one "Good job mom!"  Or remind me that I am taking a long time, "Mom, are you nearly done...I need that gray one!"  Oh, another favorite, "Mom, that is not was a black one with a hooker, not a snap thing."  Okay then...gotcha.
The sad part is, I would probably be the same way if I loved legos.  I am totally type A, follow the instructions, do it right or don't do it at all.  The key here is, I don't love legos.  As a matter of fact, I am learning to abhor them. 
But my son does love them.  He loves them and he's amazing at building them.  Ttherefore, I will curb my burning resentment toward the lego company.  I will root around in the primary colored world of yellow headed men, searching for that last "two gray one with the thingy sticking out like this  mom!"  I will endure lego corners to the knees.  I will try and try again, till the flags are flying high on the harbour flag poles.  I will remind myself, that these hours are not wsated, but invested.    And I will do this, not because I love legos, but because I love my son.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012


 Amanda says the word "flip flops" it sounds something like, "Plipfth-plthlops".  It is the highlight of my summer.  Sometimes I just ask her to say it to smile.  The other day we videoed her doing this and we have watched it multiple times just laughing.  She is so cute running around, bringing everyone their "plipfth-plthlops".  So happy as we casually sat on the floor playing with her.  Unfortunately, this is not the little girl most folks get to see.
 This summer has been a challenge...we have two little boys who are not so little and one little girl who is, but doesn't think so.  We have been doing a lot of "bigger kid" things and dragging our one and a half year old with us.  She gets less play dates and park dates and is instead taken on roadtrips for hours at a time and to play outside on trails too tough to walk and toys too big to climb.
But she tries.
I get frustrated that Amanda is so impatient and screams to get what she wants.  We don't tolerate, but it doesn't stop her.  I have tried to put myself in her little shoes and come to the conclusion,her life is very different than her brother's were at this age.  It's bigger, louder and faster and the little girl is just doin' her best to keep up.
This made me contemplate, that while part of Amanda's stubborness comes from what I believe is part of her internal tenacity that God gave her, another part comes from trying to keep up with the big boys.  And maybe in order to help my little girl do a better job at communicating and not frustrate people with her screaming fits, I need to slow down. 
 I need to stop and give her more of the time my sons got when they were practice using her words, so she can communicate, to go to parks that are her size so she can learn to climb the toys, to quietly read and play puzzles so she can learn to sit still, to stop and listen to her when she is trying to tell me something, instead of getting angry that she is so stinkin' persistant and yelling at my knees! 
I need to be willing to drag my big boys to little girl things and not just my little girl to big boy things.
I want Amanda to be known for the joy we see in her daily, not the frustration she encounters daily. She truly is such a joy on so many occasions and I want others to see it too!  And so once again, I come to the conclusion that mommy has more work to do and maybe it starts spending more time putting on our "plipth-plthlops" and less time running around in them.