It was a tough weekend at the Ryan house. A week where, try as I might, the kids don't seem to want to behave and I don't quite feel like the mom I want to be. Shawn was gone on the annual football trip, Gav was on his asthma meds and I was attached to a breast pump due to loss of milk (I got the flu) and Amanda has some weirdo rash we can't get rid of. Lovely. (Amanda also doesn't seem to be gaining weight like they want her to, but proceeds to spit out half of what she's fed, so who knows what to do there. She seems developmentally great and looks healthy, so I am letting that go for now.)
Anyway...it was one of those times where I just sat down in despair, feeling as though all I had done for three days straight is discipline my children. NOTHING was going right. I was doing my best to be consistent, but I finally broke and called my friend Stephanie crying...
"Just tell me I'm a good mom."
Oh bless Stephanie...she came through with a friend pep talk like no other and gave me a few words I think I'll be clinging to for awhile..."It's only been four days, they won't remember these four days."
Kids are resiliant and I think I forget that. They remember the train we took them on, they remember the pillow pet they got, the games we played and the special things we do. Sure, there are times they remember a punishment we doled out, but is that so bad...if sitting on your bunk bed for 30 minutes while your brother got to play games helps you remember not to throw the game pieces at your brother's head, PLEASE remember!
I think, as moms we can get down on ourselves for not having a day full of all positive reinforcement, arts and crafts, healthy snacks and hugs in between. I don't know where that reality is, but somehow I have a picture that days should go that way. My days don't. Yesterday we had chewies for snacks, no crafts what so ever and a quite a few corrections had to be made. However, I can say...there were hugs in between. And for now, in this season, I think I'm going to be proud of that.