I mess up. As a mom, I punish when grace is required and cave when accountability is needed. As a friend, I give advice when listening is the answer and frequently act without thought. As a wife I nag instead of letting God refine my husband and am flippant when respect is needed. As a follower of Jesus, I serve withoutasking who God wants me to serve and head down paths without asking where He wants me to go. As a women in this world, I lose sight of priorities. I am a mess.
As mom's, friend's, wives and women, we all know our faults. Most of us could give you a good long list in under two minutes...a very extensive and detailed list. Some of the list would be reasonable and some of it would be from expectations placed on us by society, but either way, we live with the list running through our heads daily.
The last few days, God has been reminding me of how He sees me...as a kid. His kid. A kid that He loves. When milk is spilled and fits are thrown in public. When He asks me to obey and I yell, "I don't want to!". When I hit a brother or a friend. He loves me. When I run into the street, focused only on the ball and not the oncoming car...His heart jumps into his chest. It doesn't matter what I've done or what I am doing. He loves me. Sure, I am gonna get my time outs now and then and some serious lectures, but still...he sees me and calls me to be His little princess.
He knows the mess I make of things. He is working to help me clean it up. But that doesn't stop Him from loving me and seeing me as His beautiful child that He loved from day one. It wasn't audible, but I am pretty sure this weekend, I heard God whisper..."You are a mess, I know that...but you are loved and you are beautiful child." I took great comfort in this. Because if I am going to be a mess at least I am His beautiful mess.